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June 2007
The Canadiana Fund adds donation of art from the Estate of Toni Onley for Canadaís official residences, including the Prime Ministerís residence, and the Governor Generalís residence.

 
July 2007
Outdoor conservation team attempts rescue of totems damaged during windstorm in January. Sculptural elements are extracted successfully, but more extensive damage to support columns is discovered.

 
August 2007
Jay begins conducting video making workshop for federal maximum security inmates, creating documentary of mural painting.

 

Jealous Thoughts

Here's a pretty picture ... you're at a party with your mate and you suddenly notice they are engaged in an animated discussion with a member of the opposite sex. All of their body language spells attraction - the flirtatious eyes and the come-hither smiles.

Instantly if feels as if the room temperature has risen 50 degrees and you are filled with the awful strength of a vengeful wildcat. You are jealous, in a flash, as if someone has flipped a switch you feel rage, helplessness and isolation.

It's no fun but it's perfectly normal.

"Jealously is a reflex to protect and guard something that you have," comments Edward Clark who is researching jealousy as part of his doctorial program in psychology at Simon Fraser University.

"If a person never felt jealousy, they are probably denying their feelings. This could be motivated by a fear of becoming engulfed in a relationship, becoming dependant on others and losing their identity."

"In the politics of affection and attachment, there's always a struggle between losing your identity in a relationship, while needing to create a lasting bond."

On the other end of the scale from those who deny their feelings of involvement and caring are the jealous obsessed. These are people who constantly run a movie in their minds about the cheating ways of their loved ones.

Between these two extremes of denial and obsession are the types of jealousy that all of us are likely to experience during the course of our romantic careers. Jealousy is triggered by the fear of abandonment and betrayal, and it stings as hard whether these fears are real or imagined.

If a betrayal has taken place and we have been abandoned, then we will likely engage in a painful self-interrogation which could last a few hours or several years. When her husband finally revealed his three-year affair, Carol B., a Vancouver lawyer, remembers, "Asking myself how I have changed, was this my fault? Will I ever love or be loved again?"

We feel helpless to turn off the question machine, we feel rage at ourselves for being powerless to control these painful thoughts.

Jealousy is active and dynamic. It writes scripts and plots, casts characters and accumulates evidence to feed itself. A blonde hair on a lapel becomes the cue for Scene V in a motel room, a smudge of red ink on a cuff becomes a rival's lipstick.

When we experience jealousy, our imaginations work overtime. Because we have a bond of affection with our mate, we often hate to admit to ourselves they instigated an unfaithful act. Rather, we might project them as victims of a skilful seducer.

"For a long time, I imagined my husband had been trapped by a real man-hunter. Then I found out there had been other women before her. That's when I had to accept the truth," Carol recalls.

Crime writer and Vancouver police Sgt. Joe Swan observes, "Violence motivated by jealousy usually occurs when those feelings are exaggerated by drugs or alcohol. Sadly and ironically, the victim is usually innocent."

Jealousy in these cases represents a breakdown of trust in one's self and the people around you. Self esteem is at an all time low. Rather than admitting our feelings of inadequacy to ourselves, we project these feelings of failure onto our mates.

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